Welter. A confused mass; a jumble; a state of turmoil, confusion, or a disorderly or chaotic situation.
Last week my writing life went awry. A short vacation, out of town guests, and other interruptions had kept me from working on my mystery novel revision, and I was worried that if I left it too long I’d be lost and have to start at the beginning again. Several other writing and editing projects were pending as well.
I opened my laptop. But my laptop did the unthinkable. It dumped data, blue-screened and made scary demands. I did everything it commanded but that wasn’t enough. I hit Safe Mode but I was too late. My laptop froze.
I bundled it up and raced to have it repaired. The kindly technician reassured me he would run diagnostics and call me as soon as he found out anything. I reluctantly left it behind feeling unbalanced and confused, all jumbled up.
Goldilocks and the three computers
Back home, I pulled out my old Dell laptop and booted it up, but it was slow and much too small for me.
I sat at my husband’s 22-inch giant screen computer and attempted to work on my projects but it was too big and cumbersome.
Only my laptop was just right. And it was not there.
Enantiodromia. The changing of something into its opposite. A principle introduced by Carl Jung that the superabundance of any force inevitably produces its opposite. It is equivalent to the principle of equilibrium in the natural world, in that any extreme is opposed by the system in order to restore balance.
Could this be an opportunity for me to do a diagnostic on myself? I’d set up goals and deadlines to finish my book but wasn’t making as much progress as I projected. My inner landscape was a welter of imagined obstacles. I was forcing what couldn’t be forced. I’d put too much importance on the result and forgot to enjoy the process. I even forgot I could pick up a pen and paper, which is exactly what I did. And happily wrote for four solid hours.
Many thanks to Laura Martin and Jan Haag in my writing group for a couple of writing prompts that jump-started today’s blog for me. My laptop is healthy again. Dirt in the fan caused overheating and a few corrupted files were fixed. It wasn’t the huge catastrophe I imagined after all. All is well. Balance restored.